Boxes mailed to Liz: 13
Offers on bed: 3 (1 is possibly a money laundering scam and doesn't count)
Offer on car: 1 and since rescinded (this is devastating. I need to sell it NOW! What do I do?!)
Drives down Sunset Blvd: 1 (possibly the last time. I remember when we moved here four years ago. Sunset Blvd was magic to us. Like "living in adult playland" as Vic used to say.)
Moments of "Omigod, I cannot believe I saved this for four years- what is WRONG with me?!": Oh, thousands. The best has to be the friggin' HAMMOCK I bought for $30 when I started my job even though I don't have a backyard or conceive having one for at least five more years. I mean, really.
May 21, 2008
May 19, 2008
Dear E!
You and I are done.
First, there's this.
I mean, really. I go away for a few months and look what happens. No one cares about this woman, E! No one except maybe her kids. MAYBE.
But then there was this. This has really done it. You cannot be serious.
You know how I feel about Denise Richards, E!, don't pretend like you don't. You heard me every single time I swore at the television when a story about her and Richie Sambora popped up, every time I flipped through the TiVo guide and saw Starship Troopers playing. Even Drop-Dread Gorgeous, which I adore, is home to her vacant stares and flat line-reading.
I have news for you, E! When even your pubescent little brother has the wherewithal to tear his eyes away from this seriously beautiful girl and declare that she is the worst actress in the history of mankind and is so bad that she's RUINED his beloved James Bond movie.... dude. That is some seriously bad acting. She cannot even look directly into the camera for this photo. Does she have a lazy eye? Omg, is she blind, E!? Because I have to admit, if it came out all of a sudden that Denise Richards is stone-cold blind and has been fooling the public for over a decade, well then, that is pretty damn cool and maybe worthy of a pause from yours truly.
Because that would bring it to the level of THIS.
So yeah. Until Sonora Webster gets her own reality show, consider you and I finito but good.
Sincerely,
Me
First, there's this.
I mean, really. I go away for a few months and look what happens. No one cares about this woman, E! No one except maybe her kids. MAYBE.
But then there was this. This has really done it. You cannot be serious.
You know how I feel about Denise Richards, E!, don't pretend like you don't. You heard me every single time I swore at the television when a story about her and Richie Sambora popped up, every time I flipped through the TiVo guide and saw Starship Troopers playing. Even Drop-Dread Gorgeous, which I adore, is home to her vacant stares and flat line-reading.
I have news for you, E! When even your pubescent little brother has the wherewithal to tear his eyes away from this seriously beautiful girl and declare that she is the worst actress in the history of mankind and is so bad that she's RUINED his beloved James Bond movie.... dude. That is some seriously bad acting. She cannot even look directly into the camera for this photo. Does she have a lazy eye? Omg, is she blind, E!? Because I have to admit, if it came out all of a sudden that Denise Richards is stone-cold blind and has been fooling the public for over a decade, well then, that is pretty damn cool and maybe worthy of a pause from yours truly.
Because that would bring it to the level of THIS.
So yeah. Until Sonora Webster gets her own reality show, consider you and I finito but good.
Sincerely,
Me
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